Sunday, August 12, 2012
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Friday, August 3, 2012
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
"It was all Tickey Boo"
Is how Opening Ceremony Director Danny Boyle described the production process of the semi-infamous Queen of England/James Bond sequence, the most shocking crossover of fictional characters since The Avengers movie.
So what does "Tickey Boo" mean? According to the Dictionary of (British) Slang it is NOT a way to describe the sound made by a clockwork ghost but actually an adjective meaning:
Fine, all right, in order. E.g."Yes indeed, everything is just tickety-boo, I've never felt better."
So the next time your mom/spouse/The Voices ask you how you day was and you'd rather not get into another argument about how 'eh, it was ok' is not a real answer, try "Tickey Boo" and fight instead about how you don't take other people's feeling seriously.
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Saturday, July 28, 2012
50% Homer Simpson Halftime show, 50% leak of Scarecrow fear gas.
Anyway, I liked it, or at least I think I did, as predicted I was pretty hammered and didn't even make it to the Parade of Nations sober.
What I do recall is NBC's talking heads deserve a visit to the Tower of London for a lesson about knowing when to speak and when to as the locals might say "shut your gob."
Friday, July 27, 2012
Time for the London Games, time plus 2 days actually if you want to count soccer. Which two years ago I didn't care for but now I just love. Something must have happened, brain damage likely.
I'm off soon to watch the OCs and get drunk. The goal is to be hammered old-world style before Croatia comes out. Seeing how there are always more A countries then you think there are, odds are good.
I'm going to try and keep this blog up again for another 26 days, good luck to me (and i guess to all the people who've been working towards this their ENTIRE lives too I guess.)
I'm on Twitter now too @seth410 , lots of stuff there, I'm sure.
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
(The first issue of Sports Illustrated, all the men the cover were eaten soon after by bears)
If you lived 2,784 years ago, you’d find that major sporting events were immortalized in single panel comics known as “paintings.” Having not been invented yet, there were no word balloons; instead, descriptions of the action were given in person by ancient live-bloggers, who, as per tradition, embellished events they themselves may have only heard about second-hand.
Nike of course sponsored these ancient games, albeit in her pre-sellout form as the Greek goddess of Victory, which were held every four years in honor of her celestial contemporary, Zeus. The true origin story of the games are now shrouded in myth, having been subject to hundreds of ret-cons though the centuries by artists and their patrons looking to put their own spin on popular classics. Although the ‘ultimate’ version of the story has the games being founded by the great hero Heracles in the midst of his maxi-series of twelve labors.
At first the games comprise of a single footrace between qualified citizens of the Greek city-states, but as its popularity grew, the games branched out, offering new content like boxing, wrestling, the now classic field events like the discus or javelin and even chariot racing. (There was also a lot of nudity…almost exclusively male nudity, which is fine if you’re into that, although I’ll take modern Woman’s Beach Volleyball, which is close enough.)
Soon (soon being a relative term when talking about history, in this case almost 300 years later) rival games began popping up, like the Isthmian Games in Corinth, which split the fan base, but overall they aided in each other’s stability.
However, by 393AD, social pressure in the form censorship by state sponsored religion, backed up by the threat of Roman Legions ended the games’ Golden Age. The games would pass into memory, and the public domain, until 1896 when the Modern Age began.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Sunday, August 24, 2008
:03 Someone is lowering a big wheel of cheese into the arena....
:05 Burning Man is going to break out here any second
:09 I see a lot of those anti-red eye camera flashes going off in the crowd, I'm not sure they are going to work that great.
:15 I love how all the athletes come in together like this...if anything it won't take as long.:34 The Marathon winners are then followed by a parade of more of the Chinese's elite team of tiny stunt-cuties. Adorable. They are the perfect weapon.
:42 Oh they are not playing fair if they don't turn that flag-blower on for the Greek flag...ok, nevermind.
:43 No translation subtitles NBC? This event happened almost 12 hours ago, c'mon!
:55 That is some impressive flag-folding. Hey black colored fireworks, cool.
:56 The London Mayor is rocking some classic British teeth.
1:05 I think the Austin Powers movies have ruined the idea of British citizens dancing thing for me
1:06 Oooo! The bus is transforming....c'mon Giant Robot!!!!...eh it's some pop star, who wants to bet no one can remember her name by the time the London games come around...And Jimmy Page is miming the guitar live!
1:19 IIIIINNNNNNNDDYYYYY, THE TORCH IS GOING OUT!!!
1:24 I'm getting a real ant-hill vibe off of this tower, and it's kinda creeping me out.
1:31 Pre-fab pop groups are decadent! Lip-syncing is counter-revolutionary!
1:45 WHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Up With People! Hey, it's Jackie Chan! And he's singing! Let's see Chuck Norris do that!
1:51 I think they undid all of their 'progress' on air-pollution with those fireworks.
2:01 Hey it's that one 3 Tenor who's not Pavarotti or that other guy.
2:37 Montages.....if you want memories of the games, look below.
2:28 Mao is looking over Bob Costas' shoulder, if there is a better metaphor for China's realtionship with the media, I don't know it.
Well, that's the end of the 2008 Olympics, and while I'm more then a bit sad to see them go, we're not quite done yet here at Off The Podium. Stay tuned for some last little bits, then it's...the future.
First on the Commodore 64 in 1984, Summer Games let players compete in such events as the Pole Vault, Platform Diving, Sprinting, Gymnastics, Freestyle Swimming, Skeet Shooting and Rowing at the “Epyx Games.” (Either they couldn’t afford the official license, or they just didn’t want to confuse people by calling it the “Summer Olympyx”)
An odd combination of sports, but basically all the individual events (and in the case of running and swimming, one-at-a-time relays) whose motions can be replicated using the most ubiquitous controller of the era, the single button Atari Joystick.
Being a digital signal device, there was no room for the nuance that can be found with the modern analog sticks, so trying to make your tiny gymnast avatar land on her feet after tumbling though the air was a little like playing the piano with your face.
The game came packed onto a storage medium that considered massive now only in terms of its physical size. A single five and a quarter inch floppy disk, like the one found in the box for Summer Games, at its peak could hold up to 360 Kilobytes. To put it in perspective, you could fit about 11,650 copies of Summer Games onto the first-gen, 4GB iPhone.
Very popular, Summer Games would be ported forward until finally it arrived on the Sega Master system at the start of the 8-bit era. Epyx, would also find success spinning-off the franchise with Winter Games, World Games (Caber Toss! YES!) as well as California Games, which made an appearance on the Nintendo Wii’s Virtual Console in
Sadly, Epyx folded slowly in the late eighties and early nineties, until finally selling the bulk of it’s assets to Atari, including their work on an early handheld system, one that would become the Atari Lynx. Epyx is gyne, but not forgytton…x.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Monday, August 18, 2008
Want to be an Olympian? Sure you do, but what’s that you say? You don’t qualify under either faster, higher or stronger? Cut from the JV Basketball team on the first day? Not patrician enough to afford sailing or riding lessons? Well, what about your classic backyard sports? Sure, Lawn Darts have been outlawed by people sensitive to skull puncture, and offering to demonstrate your skill at “Corn Hole” keeps getting you arrested. But what about the trampoline? You remember that thing don’t you, it’s the bouncy toy that’s kept generations of orthopedics in business for years! That’s right, the trampoline is not just a good way to pretend to exercise, its an Olympic sport!
The trampoline dates back to the old world practice of ‘blanketing,’ in which an angry mob would administer a humiliating punishment upon transgressors by flinging them into the air several times, before finally just letting them crash into the ground and become injured for their amusement, notably this is also how NASCAR got it’s start.
Science took most of the human effort out of the equation when George Nissen and Larry Griswold created the first ‘modern’ trampoline in 1934 after observing the net used by trapeze artists, and named their invention after the Spanish word for diving board, trampolin.
After stints in the Air Force and NASA, the trampoline was employed for sport and was contested for the first time in an Olympics at the 2000 Sydney Games, although international trampoline competitions were held as early as 1964. A relatively simple sport (with just the trampoline, copious padding and Dramamine for the audience needed) trampolining is judged using the same, clearly defined rules that make subjective grading so popular.
For each competitor’s routine, five judges grade how well each move (drawn from both traditional gymnastics and other gravitationally hampered sports like diving) is executed, and each keeps a running total of penalizing deductions, which is then subtracted from 10, and then the highest and lowest result from the five totals is omitted. These three numbers are then added to the difficulty score that the competitor accumulates with each move (each move having been pre-scored on its individual difficulty, and placed on a handy chart). This results in a final score that is used to rank the competitors. In case of a tie, both competitors must engage in a round of Kosho to the death.
With this info, you’ll be performing Barani Ball Outs in no time, good luck, and enjoy!
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Friday, August 15, 2008
[Phelps? I just spent two days trying to avoid being thrown to the mat with considerable force and speed just to win just this one gold and took a beating doing it, and he can win eight just by swimming, then swimming a bit further, and then swimming in a different way? How do you think I feel?]*
I don’t mean to be tough on the guy that Bob Costas calls “Superman,” even though the title of Aquaman is right there and fits so much better. (C’mon Bob, show a little Geek cred and throw that one out, I know you can, I can tell you’re Nerdcore just by looking at you.) However, I will say this to young Michael, if you hit that magic number of eight golds and come home to parades and a lifetime supply of Wheaties, just remember you are only ten years away from starring in an ad opposite a guy dressed as a giant marsupial.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Therefore, I scoured the web looking for an explanation and found the answer to be a lot more interesting than I first thought. (H/T to http://www.judoinfo.com/rules1.htm)
The goal of competitive Judo is to score a single point, called an Ippon (this is opposed to actual Judo where the goal is to finish off the masses of redshirts in front of you and still have enough energy left to take on the hidden island’s boss, the old man with the razor claw and the wheezing laugh who’s holding the world for ransom).
The first competitor to score this one point by either maintaining a pin for 25 seconds, choking out or submitting an opponent, or ideally: throwing the opponent to the mat with “considerable force and speed” (you gotta love a sport with that phrase in its official rulebook) will win instantly.
Lacking that, one can win by scoring two half-points (math is power) called Waza-ari, by achieving a not-so-forceful throw, or a 20-second pin.
Points are also scored for ‘partially successful’ throws and 15-20 second pins, known as Yuko, and non-back landing throw results and brief pins, called Koka.
Scoreboards represent these by separating them into three digit numbers. Therefore, a contestant with one Waza-ari, one Yuko and no Kokas would have a score of 110. While an opponent with zero Waza-aris three Yukos and two Kokas would have a 32. If this match timed out, the first competitor would win, even though he or she had less scoring moves. (Ippons are not recorded since scoring one would end the match)
Recently abandoned scoring rules include the awarding 5/8th of a point for throwing your opponent through a wall. Also removed: knives, lengths of lead pipe, and hunks of energy-restoring, bone-in pork roasts. Finishing moves are still allowed if enough Chi has been accumulated.
Hajime and enjoy!